I'm fed up!All my life, I've looked over my shoulder to make sure I wasn't being watched or to see if the police were around.
I don't want to deal with selling drugs anymore. No matter how smart I think I am, I still get caught.
Everytime I get caught stealing, I go to jail and I have to pay it back. Whenever I get messed up, I end up with another embarrassing story about myself or another scar.
I can't continue to live that way. If I continue on this path, I will kill myself with stress - if a bullet doesn't do it first. And if I continue to live that way and I'm lucky enough to survive, then a prison cell will be my permanent home.
This is not an educated guess - it's a fact. It is not possible to successfully live the life that I have lived.
My advice to all those who know what I'm talking about is - stop while you're ahead. Think of everything you and your loved ones can lose.
I just wanted to let you know I'm a regular reader. I'm glad you and your mother are chronicling everything: how you got to where you are, what it's really like, how it really feels, where you hope to be, and that you're offering direct advice to anyone who will listen, especially those following your original path. I just hope they're listening! Thanks. ~Mike
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